It is not a surprise that all negative thinking is fear-based, but did you know that chronic negative thinking that goes on day-after-day creates stress that can damage the body and mind, resulting in disease or worse? Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, the mind/body has a hidden defense that safeguards us from the extreme damage of fear, anxiety and worry. That defense is depression.
Depression is your body’s defense mechanism against the ill-effects of chronic negative thinking. Depression ‘turns down’ all emotional responses. Without depression, your body must deal with the constant fight-or-flight stress response that is the result of chronic negative thinking. Depression literally depresses the effects of negative thinking by numbing-you-out to fear, but depression is not selective so you also become numb to other emotions, such as love and joy.
Depression, of course, is not good for us, but the body’s first course of action is survival. If your survival is threatened due to the stress of chronic fear caused by fear-based thinking, it will do what it needs to do in order to save you.
Maybe you have blamed depression for your negative thinking but, I promise you, it is the other way around – it is your negative thinking that has caused depression. This is good news, because it means that by correcting improper thinking, you can rise up from depression.
In order to wake up from depression, you must overcome the fear-based thinking that has created the need for depression. This means that you can turn off depression by turning off negative thinking.
The mechanics of creating your reality
Depressed or not, most of us don’t even realize that we are thinking negatively because it seems to us that we are just reacting to the events in our lives, but our negative thinking is really creating those events first and foremost. There is no question of the chicken or the egg – first negative thinking then negative events. If you want to change your life, you must change your thinking. If you wait for your life to change, in order to change your thinking, you will be thinking negative thoughts forever. Whether you are aware of it or not, your thoughts create your reality. But how?
Every conscious thought that you have is recorded by your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind does not question or argue with the validity of a thought. It literally takes your word for it. So, if you say, “I am tired or I am broke,” it just says, “Yes, you are tired – Yes, you are broke,” and your thoughts are accurately recorded.
Your subconscious mind then communicates directly with the quantum mind that manifests your reality. Just like the subconscious mind, the quantum mind always says yes.
Now, a single isolated thought does not usually manifest in reality, which is really good news because if that was the case, every time we are upset with someone and wish them ill, illness would fall upon them, and we don’t really want that. At humanity’s current level of collective consciousness, it takes repetitive thoughts or beliefs in order to manifest anything in our lives.
Having said this, it is still our thoughts that create reality, and if we have negative thoughts that we think every day, those thoughts are going to manifest. Now, they might not manifest exactly as we think them, but negative thoughts always manifest in some sort of negativity. In other words, thinking negative thoughts about your neighbor may not result in a negative experience with your neighbor, unless he is on the same vibrational page, but those negative thoughts may manifest in car problems or issues at work, for example. We might not make the connection between our thinking and the events in our lives but negative thinking always begets negative experiences. This is the law of attraction, and it works regardless of if we understand how it works or not.
Life is a perfect mirror
Negative thinking is simply thinking about what you do not want, while positive thinking is thinking about what you do want. Ask yourself, do I focus more on what I do want or what I don’t want? For the majority of the world, the answer is the latter. Most people are unconsciously addicted to negative thinking. Negative thinking is not just a bad habit, it is a terrible addiction, and probably directly responsible for every other addiction known to man. After all, when we are addicted to food, TV, drugs, etc.., we are really just trying to escape our own thoughts.
Negative thinking includes the words that you say and think, and it also includes negative visualizations, self-talk and metaphors, as well as, mentally replaying unhappy memories.
Because we often don’t even recognize negative thinking, let’s take a moment to clarify several aspects of negative thinking that might pass by our radar:
Judgment of anything is negative thinking because you are focusing on what you do not like or desire.
Self-judgment is negative thinking where you are focusing on what you don’t like about yourself – and reinforcing it.
Perfectionism is just another word for self-judgment.
If you call yourself a “realist,” you are someone who rationalizes negative thinking in order to give yourself permission to think negatively.
While self-doubt is negative thinking, negative thinking creates more self-doubt.
Feeling sorry for someone is judgment of them or their experience which is negative thinking.
Worry is also another form of negative thinking because you are imagining the worst.
Even negative questions are a form of negative thinking because they produce negative answers.
If you ask yourself, “What will happen if I don’t succeed?” your mind will sort for all the terrible things that might happen, and you will be focused on what you don’t want.
Complaining about what is wrong in your reality is also negative thinking – yes, even if it is really happening.
On the way down the mountain on our bikes, my son’s bike began to have problems. Later he realized that he was in a bad mood. Not making the connection between being upset about the bike and his bad mood, I pointed out that his negative thinking caused the bad mood.
He responded, “I wasn’t thinking negatively. I was just reacting to what was really happening.”
I said, “Were you thinking about what you do want or what you don’t want?”
Reluctant to answer, he said, “I was thinking about what I don’t want.”
“So, you were thinking negatively?”
“Yes,” he answered, “Negative thinking is sneaky.”
Indeed, it is!
At this point, you might be more aware of just how much of your thinking is fear-based. Instead of being overwhelmed, this is a moment of personal power. It is your awareness that opens the door to profound change.
I’ll be honest with you, it took me many years to make the connection between my negative thinking and chronic depression. Now, it seems so clear to me. All the years that I tried relentlessly to overcome depression, I wasn’t able to do it because I was not changing my thought patterns. I wish I could go back and tell my past self, “Hey Nanice, stop focusing on what you don’t want. Take your attention off worry and fear and focus on what you do want, and keep doing it, despite evidence to the contrary.” I would tell her that her commitment to changing her mind will save her – because eventually it did!
Negative thinking first manifests as negative feelings
Any thought that makes you feel bad is a negative thought. Negative thinking causes negative feelings like sadness, frustration, jealousy, anger, etc… In fact, negative feelings are your inner guidance system telling you that you are thinking negatively and imagining what you do not want. Your feelings are telling you that your thoughts are out of control, and you going away from what you desire in life. Even though depression numbs feelings, those feelings are still very much present and persistent.
Sick and tired?
More people get sick as a result of negative thinking than anything else. You don’t find sick people with healthy thoughts. You find sick people with thoughts that create sickness. This doesn’t mean that you think about being sick.It means that you have a history of negative thinking that adversely affected your body, causing sickness.
Negative thinking profoundly affects one’s body, mind and quality of life. You can trace virtually every problem back to fear-based thinking. Negative thinking makes everything harder and requires that we give more effort to the things we want.
You cannot be anxious, overwhelmed or depressed without corresponding negative thoughts. People who think happy, peaceful and relaxing thoughts are not anxious, overwhelmed or depressed.
Why OH WHY???
If negative thinking is so detrimental to our health, well-being, relationships and prosperity, why-oh-why do we do it? Why do we habitually think negative thoughts and focus on what we do not want?
Negative thinking is a survival strategy that causes us to look for what is wrong so that we can protect ourselves against danger, but it is a very bad strategy because our thoughts actually create reality. So instead of preventing bad things from happening, we are telling the quantum mind to materialize them.
We are programmed by our parents, teachers and society how to think. If those who brought us up thought negatively, and most of them did, we learned to do the same.
Our negative beliefs about ourselves and the world cause us to have negative thoughts. If you believe that you are unworthy, your thoughts will support that belief.
Negative thinking is complete ego!
We often think of egoist thoughts as those thoughts that say, “I’m better than… or look at me,” but all negative thinking is just as much ego-based. Since our higher selves would never think the types of negative thoughts that we indulge in, negative thinking must be a result of a fearful ego that believes that you are alone, powerless and unworthy. Knowing that negative thinking comes from your ego, might help you to loosen its hold, by not paying attention to it.
There’s a lot to be said about the wisdom of children: They don’t overthink things.
In this video, adults and children are asked one question to do with their bodies and how they look. The adults responded in a way that we would all expect but the kids, on the other hand, gave imaginative and un-corrupted answers.
This definitely acts as a useful reminder for all of us to tap into that childlike positivity more often. It really is true when they say that kids sometimes know best. We can learn a lot from our children if we only listened.
This article off of Your Medical Guide resonates extremely deeply with my life, what about yours?
There will be two main types of people reading this blog: those finding themselves better equipped to understand some of the people they love and those who see their own reflections in these habits.
Depression often goes unseen, unrecognized, and undiagnosed. A person with concealed depression is someone who is conditioned to deal with their inner demons in a way that doesn’t make them clearly visible. They may or may not be diagnosed, and this may or may not be something they’ve shared with even their closest of companions. The problem is that the world becomes darkest when we all stop being able to understand each other. We tend to believe that hardship is worn openly upon one’s chest like a battle scar, but many of these wounds do not easily reveal themselves to those that do not take the time to look.
1. They may intentionally make efforts to appear OK and maybe even seem exponentially happy and upbeat.
The idea that those with depression all have one similarly dreary personality is false. Depression is more than just a mood. Those who live with depression have learned to alter their apparent moods, and may even be some of the most seemingly “happy” people that you know. Personalities can vary. Often those with depression try to stick with the positive and public parts of their demeanor regardless of what they’re going through on the inside. No one wants to bring others down, even if that means hiding how he or she is truly feeling.
2. They may have habitual remedies.
There are serious ways to treat depression, including therapy and medication. However, in addition to these remedies, there are lifestyle habits that those with depression use to treat their everyday state-of-mind. This can be in the form of music, exercise, driving, walks, or basically anything they know can get themselves out of a sinking set of emotions. Concealed depression has a lot to do with the ways people try to personally conquer their own demons.
3.They may have trouble with abandonment.
Anyone who has experienced depression understands the burden it can be. It can also be a burden for those closest to them. Sometimes when you let someone in enough to see the struggles you have, they walk the other way. Though it’s hard to blame these people for leaving, it creates a serious feeling of abandonment for those with depression. It forges a need for secrecy, out of fear of the recession of those they love. There is nothing more heartbreaking than finding out your ugliest layer of self is too ugly for someone you love to handle.
4. They can be pros at “cover-up” stories.
This can be for anything from the cuts on their arms to the reason they skipped dinner. People who live with different forms of depression experience various hardships that can at times impede the normalcy of their daily lives. In these low instances, they know what to say to avoid attention from others to those displays of pain. Often they don’t want to recognize that they are hitting a low point either, so they know how to hide it.
5. They may have abnormal sleeping and eating habits.
This may seem like a small sign or factor, but it has a grave effect. Those who live with depression in an unrevealing way can sometimes only let the little signs show. Sleeping too much or too little are textbook examples. The same goes goes for eating too little or too much. Sleep and nutrition are two critical elements to health. They are also two elements that the human mind can attempt to control. Depression creates a suffocating lack of control, and being able to control at least something, can be all a person has. Sleep can be nearly impossible, or it can be the only escape. The same goes for eating.
6. They may understand substances differently.
A person who handles their depression also knows how to monitor what they put into their body. They know alcohol is a depressant, and drinking it over an extended period of time can create a mental state of low that they are less equipped to handle than the average person. They know that caffeine and sugar are uppers for their moods. They know what medications do what. They know what doesn’t mix well. They know all of this because altering their state of mind in any way is much more of a responsibility than it may be for other people.
7. They may exhibit a very involved perception of life and death.
Not every person with depression has felt suicidal. However, depression often invokes a unique and complex thought process about life in general. Facing one’s mortality often comes at moments of desperation. It happens when you are furiously seeking answers to all of life’s questions. Being dragged in and out of horrible mindsets can cause these kind of thoughts to be more frequent.
8. They are often uniquely talented and expressive.
Many of the most inspired and life-changing artists, musicians, and leaders of this world were also plagued by mental illness. I use the word “plagued” in a contradicting fashion, because having a serious depth of emotions can also lead to profound greatness. People who live with depression that may not be visible to the naked-eye, often express themselves in incredible ways. They are in touch with the good and bad pieces of their souls. They are able to formulate and illustrate beauty through the shadows of the emotions they carry.
9. They are often searching for a purpose.
Everyone wants a purpose in life. We want to know that what we are doing is worthwhile. We want to know that we are moving in the right direction. Those who live with unseen depression want this as well, and in a way that attempts to satisfy something inside of them that may always be hungry for more. Feelings of inadequacy and fear are no stranger to the depressed mind. People with hidden depression are almost always trying to compensate in their life for the frailties that they have inside. They may change directions often. They may become incredibly involved in the pursuit of true happiness. They are also striving and searching for more.
10. They at some times will release subtle cries for help.
Even a person who knows how to live with the burden of their own mind can need help. Outcries from people you aren’t expecting are easily overlooked. Sometimes it isn’t safe for people to be on their own with their depression; as much as they say differently. Sometimes they will reach out. Sometimes they will open up. These moments are the most crucial, because they are especially powerful. They are what builds a bridge between people who have different levels of emotions and mindsets. They are what creates a closeness and trust among friends and lovers that isn’t always easy if some feel they have to camouflage their true selves.
11. They seek love and acceptance, as every person does.
Shielding the world from one’s personal demons is not done so for the sake of dishonesty. People who live with depression in a private and undisclosed way do so for protection. This is for the protection of their hearts. This is for the protection of the people around them. This is for the protection of the success of their dreams. Some of those reading this may have felt an eerie connection to these habits. Whether you have been treated for depression, or you simply have treated yourself, you know how easy it is to feel alone. I entitled this article about those with unseen depression, but the truth is that most depression goes unseen by our human nature. We live in a world that encourages us to hide what is dark and unpleasant. We don’t have to.
The most important habit and motivation of those with unseen depression to understand is that they search for love and acceptance. We all do. The only way to gain it is to spread it. Never turn away from a person who seems to be struggling. Love when it’s difficult. Cry when you need to. Reach out when someone closes the door. Open your heart, even if it feels terrifying to do so. If we keep forcing the bad to go unseen, the good will also go unseen.
I remember when it first hit me, when I was first introduced into what I was going to do at least for the next four to six years. I was excited, overwhelmed, and for the first time in three years that childhood sensation of believing I could do whatever I wanted to do came back!
After going through the motions throughout my whole High School career I could never seem to actually choose what I wanted to do. When the day came and I actually had to choose and apply for college I just picked something that I thought I would like the most, a High School teacher ironically. I hated High School and for my 4 years there I couldn’t wait to get the hell out! But I wasn’t going to make it into the NBA and my dreams were very small at this point. Three months off in the summer and eventually becoming the Head Coach for the basketball team were the only two reasons I went with this. Thank God I got into trouble and never made it to college because I never would have ran into what I truly wanted to do. I would be in debt up to my eyeballs doing something I was only partially passionate about. I think this happens way to often in the world we live in today and you can definitely see the pain in most college graduates eyes. We only get to live this life once right? Why not find your passion then just do that!
I’m passionate about helping people. That’s it. I say this a lot but I just want people to thrive. To actually feel euphoric and clear headed about where they are heading. Somehow along the lines it became acceptable to work 40 hours per week for 40 years of your life just to retire on the money that you couldn’t spend during your youth. Light weight acting like a machine in this thing we keep trying to spin around called our economy. I mean come on just hearing that the average age for retirement is going to be at 72 years if I were to go that route is a strait up scam. Why would you ever trade time for money? What’s more important honestly?
As I said before my passion is helping people. Giving people the opportunity to become their true selves because that’s when the magic happens. Everyone here on Earth has a purpose, I full heartedly believe in this. Surround yourself with the dreamers, the free thinkers, the people that are going to make you a better person. Success is 80% mental. So, if your going through a tough stretch in your life right now don’t be afraid to contact me. I may be able to introduce you to another way of life.
Last but not least check out the documentary, “Finding Joe”. I just finished watching it and it relit that fire in me! It will surely motivate you to break free of those chains you have holding you back!